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We're Nathan and
Max and boy do we love printing!
What we don't love is how much it costs. And that's why we started a talk show, "Ink Is It". It's a place to talk about our love of printing and share clever ways to get the most out of your printing dime. Hip-hip-hip-hooray! |
6/05/2007 10:03:00 AM
It's the day we've all been waiting for: Nathan & Max celebrate "Ink Appreciation Day" with a festive parade to remember. Get out those tissues because it's Episode 10, the FINAL installment of "Ink Is It"!
Labels: episode, ink appreciation, inkisit, max, nathan, parade posted @ 6/05/2007 10:03:00 AM 0 comments
6/04/2007 10:21:00 AM
Nathan & Max encourage fans to learn from Nathan's dark past and print responsibly this printing season. Brace yourself for an important message and Episode 9 of Ink Is It!
Labels: episode, inkisit, max, nathan, printers posted @ 6/04/2007 10:21:00 AM 0 comments
5/15/2007 10:10:00 AM
Nathan & Max try a revolutionary look and reflect on the magical things you can do while waiting for your images to print. It's Episode 8 of "Ink Is It"!
Labels: episode, inkisit, max, nathan, printer, printer trouble posted @ 5/15/2007 10:10:00 AM 0 comments
5/11/2007 10:28:00 AM
Look no further for fun because Max takes fan mail as well as a Rorschach ink blot test that reveals his innermost secrets. It's Episode 7 of InkIsIt!
Labels: episode, inkisit, max, nathan posted @ 5/11/2007 10:28:00 AM 0 comments
5/10/2007 10:46:00 AM
Hey, gang, it's Maxwell Bluum! Wow, you InkIsIt fans are the best. Nathan passed along some of the things you sent to help cheer me up and boy did they work. I can't get this smile off my face and -- believe me -- I tried. And, just so you know, Miranda and I are talking through the misunderstanding and we hope to have a resolution soon.
Thanks again, Maxwell Bluum Labels: cheer up, inkisit, love, max, miranda posted @ 5/10/2007 10:46:00 AM 0 comments
5/09/2007 10:21:00 AM
Hey, gang, Nathan Bannigann here and big-sized kudos to all you InkIsIt fans who submitted material to Cheer Up Maxwell Bluum. I finally sifted through all the submissions -- rap songs, firework displays, full-length motion pictures featuring talking printers -- and passed along a few to Max and boy did it bring a smile to his face. And, as promised, I thought I'd share one of your submissions. This limerick comes from Rico:
There once was a young man named Max, whose lady just up and made tracks. His search made him sprint without stopping to print, while Nathan told him to relax. Great stuff, Rico. Max couldn't be happier! Many thanks, Nathan Bannigann Labels: cheer up, limerick, max, miranda, nathan posted @ 5/09/2007 10:21:00 AM 1 comments
5/08/2007 10:21:00 AM
Hey, everyone! InkIsIt's Maxwell Bluum with some (kind of) good news. My dearest Miranda has finally come home from her charity mission, though a few days late. I was worried sick about her. Combine that with my latest printer frustrations and the last few days have been hell-ish. Naturally, when I finally saw Miranda, I had a couple of questions regarding why it took her so long to come home and she never called to tell me she'd be late. She explained that she missed her flight by accident and didn't have money to get a new one or make a phone call. She had to get some money quick, so she entered a marathon that had a $10,000 prize for first place. Apparently she won and, just before she was about to purchase a plane ticket, noticed she could get a hot air balloon ride for half the price. She opted for the balloon ride (totally understandable) and just got home.
Well, here's my issue: Miranda is flat-footed. How she won a marathon is beyond me. I've seen her run -- she looks like on an ostrich with hot coals strapped to her feet. Did Miranda lie? If so, what was she doing for the last few days? One confused bugger, Maxwell Bluum Labels: love, max, miranda, printer trouble posted @ 5/08/2007 10:21:00 AM 0 comments
5/07/2007 10:19:00 AM
Hey, gang Put on your hard hats and buckle your belts because InkIsIt's Nathan & Max have a suggestion for you parents as well as an old printer tip that'll brighten your home. It's all in the newly released Episode 6 of "Ink Is It"!
Labels: episode, inkisit, max, nathan, parents posted @ 5/07/2007 10:19:00 AM 0 comments
5/04/2007 10:48:00 AM
Hello, hello, hello InkIsIt fans! Nathan Bannigann here and all I can say today is: "Wow". My inbox has been absolutely inundated with submissions from people hoping to Cheer Up Maxwell Bluum. We've gotten rock ballads, murals, full-length DVDs with director commentary -- it's out of control! Max is going to be so cheered up. But keep those submissions coming. In fact, by popular demand, we're going to allow you a total of fifteen (15) submissions. That's right -- for those of you who have already submitted five (5), you now have ten (10) more opportunities to Cheer Up Maxwell Bluum. How come no one has submitted a Maxwell Bluum sculpture, diorama, or papier-mache? Get on it, folks, and send a picture of it to nathan@inkisit.com. Max is going to be so happy!
Until Monday, Nathan Bannigann Labels: cheer up, inkisit, love, max, miranda, nathan posted @ 5/04/2007 10:48:00 AM 0 comments
5/03/2007 10:04:00 AM
Max Bluum from critically recognized talk-show InkIsIt on this end, and I'm just gonna cut to the chase here. Has anyone seen a tall slender, blue-eyed woman that fits the following description and goes by the name of Miranda:
Tall, slender, female, big bountiful blue eyes, hair like an angel, skin the complexion of a leading lady, toes you couldn't imagine in your wildest dreams, arms so perfect you'll think god spent half the morning building them, a nose the size of a baby carrot (but the shape of a nose), a smile that makes your heart swell with befuddled delight, and lastly a torso you can set your watch to. She has all the other body parts, but they're pretty basic. I would've printed a picture of her and posted it around the neighborhood and country, but until the cost of printing drops I'm left with just the above description. Please, have it in your heart to drop what you're doing and start looking around. Thank you. Carefully, Maxwell Bluum Labels: expensive, max, miranda posted @ 5/03/2007 10:04:00 AM 1 comments
5/02/2007 11:02:00 AM
Attention all InkIsIt enthusiasts! As many of you know, my friend Max has been down in the dump trucks since his lover Miranda didn't come back from her trip. Now, don't tell Max, but I thought it might be fun if we cheered him up. It's a little project I like to call: "Cheer Up Maxwell Bluum". Nathan Labels: cheer up, inkisit, love, max, miranda, nathan posted @ 5/02/2007 11:02:00 AM 1 comments
5/01/2007 10:14:00 AM
Well, folks, I'm sorry if I don't seem like the typically chipper Maxwell Bluum today, but i'm in a bit of a gloom-funk right now. Just got back from the airport to pick up Miranda, and my worst fears came true: She never got off the plane. And neither did that guy that looked just like me, only way hunkier. You're probably wondering why I'm so calm about all this. I guess you could say I already released all of my aggression in the form of household chores. I scrubbed the floor, painted the ceilings, and installed a few, what I like to call, "air-vents" in my doors and walls. I also did a bit of printing. I don't even want to think of how much that's gonna cost me. But, it's hard to worry about money when your lover, best friend, soul mate and team mate is god-knows-where with you-know-who doing you-know-what till the cows-come-home. Anyways, if you can think of a way to cheer me up that won't cost any money cause I don't have any thanks to the high cost of printing, please let me know and quickly. If you wanna stop by, I just checked into Heartbreak Hotel. Sometimes metaphors just seem to say it best.
Color Me Very Sad, Max of InkIsIt Labels: expensive, max, miranda posted @ 5/01/2007 10:14:00 AM 0 comments
4/27/2007 10:15:00 AM
Hey, folks, it's InkIsIt internet sensation Maxwell Bluum with some great news. Ever since my lover Miranda left for her charity work, I no longer have an appetite! Nor do I need to sleep! Nor do I have money for rent! And I feel grrrrrrreat! Haha! Whoopee! I haven't been this happy since that time my printer stopped working.
Sobbingly, Max P.S. Miranda, if you're reading this, please come home! Labels: africa, love, max, miranda, printer trouble, printers, printing posted @ 4/27/2007 10:15:00 AM 0 comments
4/25/2007 10:28:00 AM
Hey, folks, InkIsIt's Maxwell Bluum here and it's been a whirlwind of a week. Last time I left you, my attractive lover Miranda was thinking of going to Africa for a week to distribute free ink cartridges and I wasn't sure whether I should let her go. After receiving hundreds of emails from people with advice -- some good, some bad, some good but about a different topic -- I decided to let her go. If our love is true, then it will surely withstand the test of time -- in this case, seven days. Unfortunately, just when I bid Miranda farewell, I saw her board the plane with a co-worker who looked just like me, only with bigger muscles and no moustache. It got me thinking: I'm screwed. I immediately returned to my condo and began eating chocolate and printing out of control. Before long, I had used all my rent money to buy more ink cartridges so I could print more. Now I have no idea how I'm going to make rent next week. Oh, dear me. Labels: expensive, love, max, miranda posted @ 4/25/2007 10:28:00 AM 0 comments
4/23/2007 10:36:00 AM
InkIsIt's Maxwell Bluum in a bit of a contemplative mood. This morning, my lover Miranda informed me of some disturbing news. Apparently she has volunteered for a program that distributes free ink cartridges to those who are unable to afford them. That's all well and good, but the program takes place in Africa and lasts an entire week. The worst part is: she's flying out tomorrow. You can imagine this has put me in a bit of a dilemma. On one hand, I'm glad she's doing some good work for those in need; on the other, I'm just not sure I can be without her for a week. Do I, Earth's Maxwell Bluum, put my personal needs aside and let her go? Or do I tell her I need her to stay or I'll most surely spend the entire week in a deep, deep sadness? Any advice?
Confusedly, Maxwell Bluum Labels: expensive, love, max, miranda posted @ 4/23/2007 10:36:00 AM 1 comments
4/19/2007 10:24:00 AM
That's right, folks: despite how I appear on InkIsIt, Maxwell Bluum isn't perfect. Last time I left you, I had written a poem for my lover Miranda. Oh, Miranda... the pudding in my pie, the magic in my magician, the milk in my dairy cow. Well, when Miranda read it, boy was she flattered. I could tell because the look on her face just seemed to say, "I am experiencing the emotion of flattery." That's all well and good, but I actually printed the poem for her 3,000 times and, if you do the mathematics, that works itself out to about to $150 buckaroos. This did not make Miranda happy. She cares about my financial well-being, knows how I get around printers, and encourages me to print responsibly so I have money to buy her unreasonably lavish gifts. In the end, it's because she cares.
Until next time, Maxwell Bluum Labels: expensive, max, miranda, poem posted @ 4/19/2007 10:24:00 AM 0 comments
4/17/2007 10:45:00 AM
InkIsIt's Max here and the lead headline in my newspaper is "Miranda Beckinsworth Sweeps Maxwell Bluum Off His Feet". To show my love for my new hugging-partner extraordinaire, I wrote her this rhyming poem:
When I first met you, I knew I had fallen for you. Your body is a wonderland, And I really like wonderlands. I'm 110% positive you're the one for me. And I'm pretty sure you like me. Do you agree that it's a well-written poem? Anyways, I just printed it for her over and over again. I'll let you know what she thinks! Happy-happy printing, Maxwell Bluum Labels: expensive, max, miranda, poem posted @ 4/17/2007 10:45:00 AM 0 comments
4/13/2007 10:07:00 AM
Maxwell Bluum of InkIsIt here. I know I said I was in love last time I checked in, but I was wrong. Now I'm IN LOVE!!!!! I couldn't have been in love before, because now I feel something completely different, something indescribable. Well, let me try to describe: you know what it feels like when you eat an ice cream sundae in a room full of pillows and kittens? Well, times that by a gazillion and divide by two. That's what I felt like when I first met Miranda. Now multiply by two. That's what I feel like NOW!
You'll never believe how perfect Miranda and I are for each other. She likes printing even more than I originally thought she did. And she hates how expensive printing is just like I do. Today she printed me out a special picture: a puppy wearing a raincoat! I love puppies! I didn't even tell her that. I did tell her I loved raincoats, though. But, still, 1 for 2 ain't bad. I wonder if she finds it difficult to keep herself from printing everything she wants to just like I do. I bet, yes! Well, I better go. I've been away from Miranda for a few minutes now and the pain is crippling. So long, gang. Love is in the airducts, Max Labels: expensive, love, max, miranda posted @ 4/13/2007 10:07:00 AM 2 comments
4/11/2007 10:47:00 AM
Put me in a basket and send me to heaven because InkIsIt's Maxwell Bluum is officially in LOVE. That's right, gang. Yesterday I ran out of ink while printing a photo of myself sobbing into my TV dinner, so I headed to the store to grab a new ink cartridge. As usual, I was rather saddened that the ink cartridges were all wildly expensive, but could not be more delighted when the sales clerk, the lovely and beautiful Miranda, asked me if I needed assistance. Once I saw her, my knees buckled, my head started spinning, and then I just swooned. When I came to, she was standing over me. The only words I could mutter were, "Will you like to share a plate of mozzarella sticks with me?" She said "yes" and, next thing you know, we were at dinner laughing and laughing and telling secrets and crying and laughing some more then ordering appetizers then laughing then ordering a main course then crying then laughing again. I wish that night never ended. Luckily, she gave me her phone number so I think we're gonna meet up again. Oh, the true Maxwell has finally emerged from his cocoon-like shell.
Blissfully, Max Labels: dating, expensive, love, max posted @ 4/11/2007 10:47:00 AM 0 comments
4/09/2007 10:35:00 AM
Maxwell Bluum here from InkIsIt, just getting back from the zoo. I swear those monkeys get smarter every week I visit. Today, the adult monkey was dancing. And there's just something about seeing an adult monkey dance that makes me wanna print. But, usually on zoo day, I try not to print, because visiting the zoo ain't cheap, and printing, well, don't get me started about the cost of printing. But, the second I got back from the zoo, yup, you guessed it, I'm printing more pictures of monkeys than there is space to hang them. After printing my fifth document, luckily I got distracted by a blue jay that flew into my condo, but I just know the second that blue jay leaves I'm gonna be printing again. Uh-oh, better go, a squirrel just scurried in through my back door, and I don't think he likes the blue jay. If this keeps up I may never have to go the zoo again!
Zoologist-in-Training, Maxwell Bluum posted @ 4/09/2007 10:35:00 AM 1 comments
4/05/2007 10:34:00 AM
Wo-ho-ho, folks. "InkIsIt" celebrity host Maxwell Bluum here and I just conducted what scientists like to call a "scientific experiment". I set out to find which was quicker: printing a color photo of a beautiful elephant or cooking a personal pizza. After five minutes of printing/cooking, here is a picture of each:
Labels: elephant, max, pizza, slow printer posted @ 4/05/2007 10:34:00 AM 0 comments
4/03/2007 10:27:00 AM
Hiya, gang. Maxwell Bluumbergingtonfield here from InkIsIt. Just kidding, it's just regular old Maxwell Bluum. So, I just tried this new thing where I don't print for a day. I did that yesterday, and if my calculations are correct I saved enough money to treat a special lady to a special date. Normally, I go halvesies with my dates because I print so darn much, but if I keep up this no printing thing, I think I'll be able to treat the whole deal, and still have enough left over to pay for her cab ride home. Oh, who am I kidding, I'm never gonna keep this no printing thing up.
Still broke, Max posted @ 4/03/2007 10:27:00 AM 0 comments
4/02/2007 10:04:00 AM
My oh my. InkIsIt's Nathan Bannigann and Maxwell Bluum here and boy are we having a laugh. Everyone, please rest assured that yesterday's announcement was indeed an April Fools' prank like the world has never seen. We also learned a lesson: if you want to find out how much people care about you, tell them you're quitting then just soak up the compliments. Anyways, here's one last joke for all you humor consumers: Don't you just love how inexpensive it is to print things?
Just kidding!!! Joker Extraordinaires, Nathan & Max Labels: april fools', expensive, max, nathan posted @ 4/02/2007 10:04:00 AM 0 comments
3/29/2007 03:11:00 PM
InkIsIt's Maxwell Bluum here and I just got back from Burnaby, British Columbia, Canada. That is one helluva city and heck if they're not "Ink Is It" fans. I don't want to say I'm a celebrity there, but let's just say I didn't have to pay for extra butter at the popcorn stand. To all you folks in Burnaby, thank you for sharing your wonderful city with me! Keep it on the page, Maxwell Bluum posted @ 3/29/2007 03:11:00 PM 4 comments
3/27/2007 12:25:00 PM
It's no secret: InkIsIt's Maxwell Bluum is a lover with no one to love, a Romeo with no Juliet, a janitor with no mop. Now, usually I just sit in my condo and print away my sadness, but not today. Today, I'm going to do something about it. I'm sending out an S.O.S. to the entire single, attractive female community. If you too are a lover with no one to love, and you wouldn't mind loving a talk-show host with a moustache who's nuts about printing, and wouldn't mind one day living in a house with a garden and a white picket fence and a moat with a drawbridge, then let me know. Also, it would be a plus if you were a billionaire, so I could print whatever I want, whenever I want.
Ready to be loved, Max Labels: dating, expensive, love, max posted @ 3/27/2007 12:25:00 PM 0 comments
3/23/2007 10:23:00 AM
Yesiree, folks! Maxwell Bluum is fifty years young today. That's 49 years older than InkIsIt. Sad to say I have no significant other to spend the day with, but that's okay. Why? I'll be spending the day with my imagination, and my printer. I've only been fifty for twenty minutes, and I've already printed out several things! Mostly pictures of me eating dinner in my empty hot tub, but something tells me this time next year that hot tub won't be empty. With some luck and hard work, it won't be long until it's overflowing with significant others!
The birthday boy, Maxwell Bluum Labels: birthday, dating, love, max posted @ 3/23/2007 10:23:00 AM 0 comments
3/21/2007 11:32:00 AM
InkIsIt's Maxwell Bluum here and boy am I excited! I was watching the tube today and saw these big-bodied bodybuilders showing off their hard muscles and winning steamboatloads of money. It got me thinking: if I tacked on some poundage, hit the bricks, then entered one of these showdowns, I might win enough money to finally print all I've ever wanted. I'm going to start today. Here's my diet...
Breakfast: Eggs, bacon, and weight gainer. Brunch: Chicken sandwich, weight gainer, sheet cake. Lunch: Just the sheet cake. Dinner: Dinner foods. And here's my daily workout... 10,000 Jumping Jacks Totally great! Stay tuned, gang. Maxwell Bluum is on his way to bigger muscles and an even bigger printing budget. Holy moly, Max Labels: bodybuilder, expensive, max posted @ 3/21/2007 11:32:00 AM 1 comments
3/20/2007 10:27:00 AM
Hey, gang! InkIsIt's Nathan & Max here and we're swatting flies and getting a full body workout all the way to the top of our game! It's Episode 5 of "Ink Is It"! Labels: episode, max, nathan, printer tip, video posted @ 3/20/2007 10:27:00 AM 1 comments
3/16/2007 09:45:00 AM
Okey-dokey, gang, St. Patrick's Day is here and you know what that means: time for InkIsIt's Maxwell Bluum to print all things green. This morning I printed this picture and put it on my wall:
 Pretty cool, huh? Well, it's nothing compared to this:  I look like a blue alien dipped in green paint! Problem is: I just used all my cyan and yellow ink -- sometimes you just wish those suckers could hold enough ink to get you through St. Patrick's Day. Talk to you all soon, Max Labels: holidays, ink cartridge trouble, max posted @ 3/16/2007 09:45:00 AM 0 comments
3/14/2007 10:08:00 AM
Okay, take it easy, gang. InkIsIt's Maxwell Bluum here reminding you that we all make mistakes. A story: a few months back, Nathan showed me a picture of a chair and I thought it was a leopard. They both have four legs and a back -- it's an honest mistake. Now, I was just taking in the internet and came across this poor man who made a similar ding-dong move and everyone just wants to point and laugh.
Don't act like you've never gotten those two mixed up before, gang. Jeez louise. Until Next Time, Max posted @ 3/14/2007 10:08:00 AM 1 comments
3/12/2007 11:00:00 AM
Good afternoon ladies, germs, children, and miscellaneous! Ink Is It's Maxwell Bluum here with a tip on the quick that'll stuff a couple extra printing dollars in your rear-end pocket: if you're in between jobs, or just happen to have a few weeks of days on your hands, why not take a paid vacation to the exotic land of paid medical research? Not only will you get compensated handsomely with limited risk, but you'll also save the lives of a few lab rats along the way. I've done this once before and I made 200 big ones and it only cost me two weeks of my time and the use of my toes. Lucky for me, you don't need toes to know that I made out like a bandit!
To find out more about paid medical research, visit your local hospital or just ask a homeless person! Thank me later, Max Labels: expensive, max, medical research posted @ 3/12/2007 11:00:00 AM 3 comments
3/08/2007 11:29:00 AM
Hey, gang! Ink Is It's Maxwell Bluum here. Now if there's one goal I've had since I was a child, it was to one day hold a World Record. Growing up, the first record I wanted to hold was to be the world's fastest man, but I couldn't do that because I lived too far from the track and, even when I did get to the track, running made me unbearably sweaty. The next record I wanted to hold was World's Tallest Man, but I came up short despite a valiant effort. And now I have my eye on a new world record: largest printed picture of a dolphin. That's why, last week, I went to the zoo and took a picture of a dolphin and, using some technological trickery, blew it up to a size of 20,000 square feet. Due to budgetary restrictions, I can only print my picture at a rate of one 8.5 x 11" page per day, but when it's done, people will say, "You're Maxwell Bluum? The same guy who holds a World Record?" and I'll humbly reply, "At least that's what the billboard in my front yard says."
Your Printing Friend, Max Labels: expensive, max, world record posted @ 3/08/2007 11:29:00 AM 1 comments
3/06/2007 11:10:00 AM
"Ink Is It's" very own Maxwell Bluum here with a tale of misadventure. This morning I came across a famous painting by Edward Hopper called "Nighthawks" that I absolutely adore and just had to print. Wanting to print the picture, but not wanting to spend the money, I decided to just draw it myself. And guess what? You can barely tell the difference. Here is the original version:
 And here is my rendition:  Which painting is the real one? Nobody knows! Your printing friend, Max Labels: expensive, max, painting posted @ 3/06/2007 11:10:00 AM 1 comments
3/02/2007 07:09:00 PM
Hey gang, get ready for a new video next week. We're working over the weekend to deliver you the best episode of Ink Is It yet. In the meantime, we couldn't help but share a photo of the cute friends we printed last night.
 Labels: cute, max, printer, video posted @ 3/02/2007 07:09:00 PM 1 comments
3/01/2007 10:28:00 AM
It's your friend, Max from Ink Is It, with some pretty bad news. It's only been three days and I already lost the bet I made with Nathan that I couldn't go one whole week without printing. To be honest, I didn't even make it until day three. It was day two and I was trying to distract myself from printing by writing a poem. Then, next thing I knew, I had written a masterpiece, and I couldn't bear not to print it and frame it. So, on the bright side, chances are I'll make well over the $10,000 I owe Nathan when I sell the poem. My guess is, I'll make enough money to at least buy a few ink cartridges. Anyway, without further adieu, here's the poem:
So what if I can't print, I can still write a poem, One about sharks, and robots, and wizards named Doem, It's also about a pole, yes a Totem. Thank you, oh thank you, for reading my poem. Thank you for reading my poem, everyone. Max P.S. I'll let you know when it hits bookshelves, but probably not for at least a few months. posted @ 3/01/2007 10:28:00 AM 0 comments
2/27/2007 10:45:00 AM
Ink Is It's Maxwell Bluum here with a very special announcement to anyone reading this. As you read these words I, Maxwell Bluum, am on my first day of a weeklong bet I just made with Nathan. Nathan bet me that I couldn't go an entire week's worth of time without printing a single document. If I win, Nathan pays me, what we're estimating I'll save by not printing for a week: $1,200. But, if I don't win, then I pay Nathan $10,000. I don't remember why I have to pay him more, but it made sense when we made the bet.
Wish me luck, Max posted @ 2/27/2007 10:45:00 AM 0 comments
2/25/2007 05:10:00 PM
Hey, gang! Ink Is It's Maxwell Bluum here and I can't wait to watch the Academy Awards being held today at the Kodak Theatre. In fact, I've printed a color photo of all the nominees. I know what you're thinking: "Isn't that expensive?" What you're thinking is true! That's why I decided to make up the cost by selling all my televisions. It's going to be a great Oscars! Labels: kodak, max, oscars, photos posted @ 2/25/2007 05:10:00 PM 0 comments
2/22/2007 10:28:00 AM
Man oh man, gang. Maxwell Bluum here and boy did I have a wet mop of a day. This morning, I ran out of magenta ink and didn't have the Benjamins to buy a new ink cartridge. Here's where things get hairy. My mother calls today and asks me to take a picture of her pet bird, Honorable Henry, and print it in color. And what color is Honorable Henry? Magenta. Not wanting to disappoint Mother Bluum, I tried to make some makeshift magenta ink out of blueberries and butterfly wings -- needless to say, it didn't go well. I took two steps out the door before my butterfly net got caught on a nail and ripped right in half (Hint: If you're gonna buy a butterfly net, avoid the Insect Seducer 2560.) My next idea was to actually extract the pigment from Honorable Henry's wings and somehow siphon it into the ink cartridge. Problem was, I approached Honorable Henry ready to pluck a couple extraneous feathers and he gave me this look like, "Not today, bucko."
In the end, Mother Bluum was stuck with a black and white picture of Honorable Henry. Why couldn't she befriend a crow? Pretty sad over here, Your Ink Is It Co-host Max Labels: expensive, ink cartridge trouble, max, pets posted @ 2/22/2007 10:28:00 AM 0 comments
2/20/2007 10:33:00 AM
Hi, everyone, this is Ink Is It's very own Maxwell Bluum! So wonderful to be once again sharing my thoughts on the internet!
I had a helluva morning. I woke up where I fell asleep last night: on my beanbag. Then I did the first thing I do every morning: printed a picture! This morning I printed a color picture of me wearing every sweater in my wardrobe. Have you ever seen a picture of a guy wearing two sweaters? Hilarious! It took so long for the picture to print that, while I was waiting, I got a haircut from a haircut store. It still wasn't done when I got home, so I decided to feed my hamster, then feed my hamster to my snake, and then finally the picture was done. Holy smokes! Max Labels: max, slow printer posted @ 2/20/2007 10:33:00 AM 0 comments
2/16/2007 11:17:00 AM
Hey, everyone, Maxwell Bluum here! Guess what, folks? It was a lonely Valentine's Day so I've just reentered the ol' dating scene. Unfortunately, I've stumbled out of the blocks, some might say. Last night, I took out a woman named Francis McDonald-McDouglas who I met paying a toll on the freeway. Per a suggestion in "Serious Daters Weekly", we rented a romantic comedy feature film and snuggled up with a garbage bag's worth of cheddar popcorn. To my delight, Francis was able to eat the whole bag herself! To commemorate the moment, I took a picture of Francis holding the empty bag and printed it for her. Unfortunately, my printer smudged the picture, making Francis appear like something you might see in a horror film starring a monster. Needless to say, she was not pleased and stormed out my condo, taking some cash I had lying around with her. It was one of those moments where you wish your printer functioned consistently and you had a bank account.
So, my printer has set me back once again. If there's anyone out there who shares my love of printing, loves popcorn, and is not bothered by the sight of misshaped toes, feel free to email me at max@inkist.com. Your friend (and more?), Maxwell Labels: dating, max, printer trouble posted @ 2/16/2007 11:17:00 AM 0 comments
2/14/2007 01:05:00 PM
Helloooooo, community! It's Max at the keyboard yet again. I've said it before and I'll say it today: there's nothing better than being single on Valentine's Day! Happy to convince: You see, if I were in the middle of a serious, fulfilling relationship I'd probably have to drop at least 300 bones tonight between dinner, drinks, and nightcaps. Now unfortunately, you can't put a price on love, so it's hard to figure exactly how much better off singles are today, but let's not worry about that, let's just enjoy the extra bucks in our otherwise empty pockets of bachelorhood. Well, what are you waiting for singles? Pick up that chin, wipe away those tears, and print away your sadness.
If there happens to be any other lucky singles out there who'd rather not print alone, then feel free to shoot me an email, and I'll be right over with my mobile computer and a shoulder to cry on top of. Yessirre, Max Labels: max posted @ 2/14/2007 01:05:00 PM 0 comments
2/12/2007 11:16:00 AM
Hey, folks, Maxwell Bluum here with an anecdote. Yesterday, I came up with the most wonderful of pranks to play on Nathan. This morning, I was going to put a sign on his desk saying, "If you're reading this right now, you're a moron." That's right, folks -- Maxwell Bluum is not afraid to stir the proverbial pot. Anyways, the problem was my printer kept jamming, so I wasn't able to print the sign.
Still wanting to trick my friend Nathan and unable to use the printer, I came up with another prank. When Nathan walked into the office this morning, I snuck up behind him and hit him with a one-by-four. Wait till he wakes up and finds out it was me! Rap at ya later, Max Labels: max posted @ 2/12/2007 11:16:00 AM 0 comments
2/08/2007 10:10:00 AM
Good news, gang! I finally saved up enough money to print my 300-page fiction novella entitled, "Humphrey Lansdowne: Duck Detective". It's about a talking duck who solves crimes for the local police force. I don't want to give the story away, but in the climax, the chief of police asks Humphrey, "Hey, the mayor's daughter has been kidnapped and being held ransom -- what can you tell us?" Humphrey leans back in his chair and replies, "Oh, you stupid human, did you check the mayor's trunk?" The chief of police opens the mayor's trunk and, lo and behold, there's his daughter -- turns out the mayor was just trying to get the money for himself! The chief of police then slaps the handcuffs on the mayor. That's when Humphrey waddles up to the mayor and says, "Hey, mayor, you can't duck the law!" Humphrey then turns to the chief of police and winks as if to say, "You didn't think a duck could solve such a huge crime, but then through a humbling process of mutual understanding, you realized that ducks are a valuable member of society and, maybe if I gave them a chance, perhaps they could help me not only professionally, but personally as well." In the end, I hope Humphrey Lansdowne does for ducks what Lassie did for the dog community.
Well, anyways, unfortunately I can only afford to print one copy of "Humphrey Lansdowne: Duck Detective", but I think it'll be worth it. Until next time, Max Labels: max posted @ 2/08/2007 10:10:00 AM 0 comments
2/06/2007 07:00:00 AM
Hiya, guys and gals. Boy do I have a brain-buster for ya: try to explain why birds can fly without using the words "wings" and "terrific". Nathan plunked that noodle-scratcher on me this morning and after writing essay after essay and burning through two $40 ink cartridges, I can confidently say that you cannot explain why birds can fly without using the word "terrific". It was a little easier to not use the word "wings" (Hint: just call 'em "feathered flappers".) I guess I don't have to tell you that I've got the three b's: feeling blue, broke, and brain-busted. If anyone can think of a way to get around using the word "terrific", please let me know.
Color me sad, Max Labels: max posted @ 2/06/2007 07:00:00 AM 0 comments
2/06/2007 06:15:00 AM
Fantastic! You made it!! This is Nathan and Max and welcome to our "Ink Is It" website. If you love ink, or are interested in loving ink, we're your guys! Stay tuned for our extra-special episodes of "Ink Is It", as well as games, contests, fun facts, things, surprises, letters of the alphabet arranged in random order, tgjkreqlws, and everything you ever wanted to know about ink and how it makes activities fun. Terrific! And don't be surprised if you see a few summertime suggestions!
Happy Printing, Nathan and Max posted @ 2/06/2007 06:15:00 AM 0 comments |
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