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We're Nathan and
Max and boy do we love printing!
What we don't love is how much it costs. And that's why we started a talk show, "Ink Is It". It's a place to talk about our love of printing and share clever ways to get the most out of your printing dime. Hip-hip-hip-hooray! |
2/28/2007 10:16:00 AM
Hey, folks, guess what? Ink cartridges are a fortune. That's why I'm here to give you a tip on how to get more greenbacks so you can print more. Here's what you're gonna want to do: become rich. With all that cash, you can print as much as you want. Now how do you get rich? Simple. Whatever job you're at, be the first one to show up to work. Then, when your boss asks you for your ideas, provide ones that are brilliant and increase the net worth of the company tenfold. The next step is to get promoted until you're eventually the CEO. It's just that easy, folks.
Your Ink Is It friend, Nathan posted @ 2/28/2007 10:16:00 AM 0 comments
2/27/2007 10:45:00 AM
Ink Is It's Maxwell Bluum here with a very special announcement to anyone reading this. As you read these words I, Maxwell Bluum, am on my first day of a weeklong bet I just made with Nathan. Nathan bet me that I couldn't go an entire week's worth of time without printing a single document. If I win, Nathan pays me, what we're estimating I'll save by not printing for a week: $1,200. But, if I don't win, then I pay Nathan $10,000. I don't remember why I have to pay him more, but it made sense when we made the bet.
Wish me luck, Max posted @ 2/27/2007 10:45:00 AM 0 comments
2/26/2007 11:48:00 AM
Holy smokestacks! Ink Is It's Nathan Bannigann here waking up with a post-Academy Awards hangover. What a night -- the comedy routines were such a bright spot! My only complaint is that the ceremony was a bit too short. If you ask me, it would've helped if it dragged on a bit longer, particularly in regards to the acceptance speeches. These people get paid millions of dollars to make movies that make us laugh, cry, and confused. The least we can do is let them give a lengthy (five minute range) rant on their inspirations and who had to make sacrifices to get them where they are today. It's like when I print more than my family can afford -- my wife and daughter have to suffer and I thank them every night for it, unless I'm busy or I've printed way too much to show my face.
Anyways, to all those celebrities out there who didn't get to thank as many people as they would've liked in front of a national audience, you are in my heart. Until next time, Nathan Labels: expensive, nathan, oscars posted @ 2/26/2007 11:48:00 AM 0 comments
2/25/2007 05:10:00 PM
Hey, gang! Ink Is It's Maxwell Bluum here and I can't wait to watch the Academy Awards being held today at the Kodak Theatre. In fact, I've printed a color photo of all the nominees. I know what you're thinking: "Isn't that expensive?" What you're thinking is true! That's why I decided to make up the cost by selling all my televisions. It's going to be a great Oscars! Labels: kodak, max, oscars, photos posted @ 2/25/2007 05:10:00 PM 0 comments
2/23/2007 12:01:00 PM
Yikes! Big news in the ink world. Get this: a giant squid -- those are the sea-faring animals with the big heads and long legs -- has been caught off the coast of Antarctica and it weighs 990 pounds! That's the largest squid ever caught. If even half of that poundage is ink, well that would be just... whoa. Kinda gets you thinkin'. I don't want to make any guarantees, but let's just say Nathan-o Bannigann-o has an idea-o on how to get some cheap-o ink-o, yo-yo. Stay tuned to Ink Is It...
Your friend, Nathan posted @ 2/23/2007 12:01:00 PM 0 comments
2/22/2007 10:28:00 AM
Man oh man, gang. Maxwell Bluum here and boy did I have a wet mop of a day. This morning, I ran out of magenta ink and didn't have the Benjamins to buy a new ink cartridge. Here's where things get hairy. My mother calls today and asks me to take a picture of her pet bird, Honorable Henry, and print it in color. And what color is Honorable Henry? Magenta. Not wanting to disappoint Mother Bluum, I tried to make some makeshift magenta ink out of blueberries and butterfly wings -- needless to say, it didn't go well. I took two steps out the door before my butterfly net got caught on a nail and ripped right in half (Hint: If you're gonna buy a butterfly net, avoid the Insect Seducer 2560.) My next idea was to actually extract the pigment from Honorable Henry's wings and somehow siphon it into the ink cartridge. Problem was, I approached Honorable Henry ready to pluck a couple extraneous feathers and he gave me this look like, "Not today, bucko."
In the end, Mother Bluum was stuck with a black and white picture of Honorable Henry. Why couldn't she befriend a crow? Pretty sad over here, Your Ink Is It Co-host Max Labels: expensive, ink cartridge trouble, max, pets posted @ 2/22/2007 10:28:00 AM 0 comments
2/21/2007 09:56:00 AM
Helllooooo, everybody. Nathan Bannigann's my name and my game is printing. Might wanna grab some tissues before you read this one, because it is a sad one. It all started about a week ago when I was printing a picture of the family dog, Derrick, to send to my son, also Derrick, while he's away at his grandmother's (Derrick as well). Everything was going fine: I printed the picture, put it in an envelope, and sent it off. But just today, I got a call from Derrick crying his eyes out because he thought Derrick, the dog, lost his head. Turned out I had printed a bottom tease -- it printed everything but the head and poor Derrick thought his dog was dead. Boy, did I laugh. But, after a second I was able to regain my composure and explain to Derrick that his dog was still alive, and that the picture he saw was just a bottom tease. Derrick stopped crying for a second, but after a moment he started crying all over again. That's when I learned the only thing that saddens Derrick more than the thought of his dog without a head is a bottom tease. To make everyone feel better, I took the three Derricks out for ice cream.
Thoughtfully, Your Ink Is It Host Nathan Labels: family dog, nathan, printer trouble posted @ 2/21/2007 09:56:00 AM 0 comments
2/20/2007 10:33:00 AM
Hi, everyone, this is Ink Is It's very own Maxwell Bluum! So wonderful to be once again sharing my thoughts on the internet!
I had a helluva morning. I woke up where I fell asleep last night: on my beanbag. Then I did the first thing I do every morning: printed a picture! This morning I printed a color picture of me wearing every sweater in my wardrobe. Have you ever seen a picture of a guy wearing two sweaters? Hilarious! It took so long for the picture to print that, while I was waiting, I got a haircut from a haircut store. It still wasn't done when I got home, so I decided to feed my hamster, then feed my hamster to my snake, and then finally the picture was done. Holy smokes! Max Labels: max, slow printer posted @ 2/20/2007 10:33:00 AM 0 comments
2/19/2007 08:54:00 AM
Hello, gang! Nathan Bannigann here wishing you a very happy President's Day. I celebrated this President's Day the way I always do: by printing a picture of my favorite president, James Polk (1795-1849). Well known as the "Least Known President", Polk served in office from 1845-1849, though many historians still debate over whether or not he was actually a president. Polk is highly regarded for his success in the Mexican-American War and his failed attempts to instigate many other wars. He was the first president to retire after his first term and not seek re-election, a decision many chalk up to his innate ability to not push his luck. Unfortunately, he died three months after his term ended. Word is that his funeral, though short in duration, was well-attended. (But what do you expect? He might have been president.)
James Polk, it was worth the extra buck to print you in color! Happy Holiday, Nathan  Labels: expensive, holidays, nathan posted @ 2/19/2007 08:54:00 AM 0 comments
2/16/2007 11:17:00 AM
Hey, everyone, Maxwell Bluum here! Guess what, folks? It was a lonely Valentine's Day so I've just reentered the ol' dating scene. Unfortunately, I've stumbled out of the blocks, some might say. Last night, I took out a woman named Francis McDonald-McDouglas who I met paying a toll on the freeway. Per a suggestion in "Serious Daters Weekly", we rented a romantic comedy feature film and snuggled up with a garbage bag's worth of cheddar popcorn. To my delight, Francis was able to eat the whole bag herself! To commemorate the moment, I took a picture of Francis holding the empty bag and printed it for her. Unfortunately, my printer smudged the picture, making Francis appear like something you might see in a horror film starring a monster. Needless to say, she was not pleased and stormed out my condo, taking some cash I had lying around with her. It was one of those moments where you wish your printer functioned consistently and you had a bank account.
So, my printer has set me back once again. If there's anyone out there who shares my love of printing, loves popcorn, and is not bothered by the sight of misshaped toes, feel free to email me at max@inkist.com. Your friend (and more?), Maxwell Labels: dating, max, printer trouble posted @ 2/16/2007 11:17:00 AM 0 comments
2/15/2007 11:12:00 AM
Hello, hello, everyone! Nathan Bannigann here and I just couldn't wait to talk with you on this very special day. Now if you're like Max and I then chances are you have an extra printer lying around the house -- maybe you got it for free when you bought your computer or maybe you just can't afford to actually use it. Anyways, Max and I came up with a fun little game we play with that inkless printer. Basically, what I do is I close my eyes, then, while I count to a thousand, Max drives around town and hides the printer somewhere three feet underground. Then I run around town with a shovel and dig hole after hole until I can find the printer. One time, to make the game harder, I searched for the printer blindfolded. We had to stop that though because I got hit by numerous cars and fists.
Anyways, don't try that game at home, gang. Though it really helps build up your digging muscles, it is dangerous. Maybe best to use that inkless printer for something more useful -- perhaps cover it with salt and use it as a salt lick for any local animals seeking the nutrients they need most: salt. Keep on printing, Nathan Labels: nathan, printer tip posted @ 2/15/2007 11:12:00 AM 0 comments
2/14/2007 01:05:00 PM
Helloooooo, community! It's Max at the keyboard yet again. I've said it before and I'll say it today: there's nothing better than being single on Valentine's Day! Happy to convince: You see, if I were in the middle of a serious, fulfilling relationship I'd probably have to drop at least 300 bones tonight between dinner, drinks, and nightcaps. Now unfortunately, you can't put a price on love, so it's hard to figure exactly how much better off singles are today, but let's not worry about that, let's just enjoy the extra bucks in our otherwise empty pockets of bachelorhood. Well, what are you waiting for singles? Pick up that chin, wipe away those tears, and print away your sadness.
If there happens to be any other lucky singles out there who'd rather not print alone, then feel free to shoot me an email, and I'll be right over with my mobile computer and a shoulder to cry on top of. Yessirre, Max Labels: max posted @ 2/14/2007 01:05:00 PM 0 comments
2/13/2007 07:22:00 PM
In the latest episode of "Ink Is It," Nathan and Max host a telethon to raise money for all those people who can't afford to print to their heart's content (that's everyone because it costs a fortune). If you can't send money, send your ink cartridges so we can give them to people who did send money. Call now!
Labels: inkisit, stand-up, telethon, video posted @ 2/13/2007 07:22:00 PM 0 comments
2/13/2007 10:52:00 AM
I found it! I found a solution! Okay, so you know how printing is really expensive? Well, I discovered a way to earn what people in the money business call "passive income": my family and I have rented our garage space to a local weather club for one dollar a week -- with that extra income, I'm able to print an extra color photo every week! Plus, they allow me to sit in on their weekly meetings. I've learned so much about the weather that now, whenever someone says to me, "How about this weather?", I don't just say something inane like, "Yeah, it's really something"; instead I deliver a twenty minute fact-heavy lecture that I think everyone would agree is as informative as it is loud.
The point, folks, is that I encourage you to find creative ways to supplement your income so you can fulfill your printing dreams. Just don't try to poach my weather club -- next week we're decorating a wind chime with club president Stan's poorly received engagement ring! Happy printing, Nathan Labels: nathan posted @ 2/13/2007 10:52:00 AM 0 comments
2/12/2007 11:16:00 AM
Hey, folks, Maxwell Bluum here with an anecdote. Yesterday, I came up with the most wonderful of pranks to play on Nathan. This morning, I was going to put a sign on his desk saying, "If you're reading this right now, you're a moron." That's right, folks -- Maxwell Bluum is not afraid to stir the proverbial pot. Anyways, the problem was my printer kept jamming, so I wasn't able to print the sign.
Still wanting to trick my friend Nathan and unable to use the printer, I came up with another prank. When Nathan walked into the office this morning, I snuck up behind him and hit him with a one-by-four. Wait till he wakes up and finds out it was me! Rap at ya later, Max Labels: max posted @ 2/12/2007 11:16:00 AM 0 comments
2/09/2007 10:30:00 AM
Hey, gang! This is Nathan, the host who sits on your right on the show, or if you're not good with directions, I'm the more handsome one. Today, I thought of a fun way to make it feel like you're printing in color, but without paying all the money to do it. You just print with black ink like you normally would, then you go to the art supply store and pick out some of your favorite color paints and a commercial paintbrush. Then go home, take out the document you wanted to print in color, and start painting. It's not quite the same as printing in color, but when you're done, you end up with a very colorful document and, if you attach weights to the paintbrush, you get a good workout, too.
Off to print, Nathan posted @ 2/09/2007 10:30:00 AM 0 comments
2/08/2007 07:06:00 PM
Watch Episode 2 of "Ink Is It," folks. Max shows off his homemade bling and the guys offer exciting ink tips on how to save some greenbacks so you can print more. We think you'll like it as much as Nathan likes riding escalators. That's a lot!
Labels: bling, ink tip, inkisit, video posted @ 2/08/2007 07:06:00 PM 0 comments
2/08/2007 10:10:00 AM
Good news, gang! I finally saved up enough money to print my 300-page fiction novella entitled, "Humphrey Lansdowne: Duck Detective". It's about a talking duck who solves crimes for the local police force. I don't want to give the story away, but in the climax, the chief of police asks Humphrey, "Hey, the mayor's daughter has been kidnapped and being held ransom -- what can you tell us?" Humphrey leans back in his chair and replies, "Oh, you stupid human, did you check the mayor's trunk?" The chief of police opens the mayor's trunk and, lo and behold, there's his daughter -- turns out the mayor was just trying to get the money for himself! The chief of police then slaps the handcuffs on the mayor. That's when Humphrey waddles up to the mayor and says, "Hey, mayor, you can't duck the law!" Humphrey then turns to the chief of police and winks as if to say, "You didn't think a duck could solve such a huge crime, but then through a humbling process of mutual understanding, you realized that ducks are a valuable member of society and, maybe if I gave them a chance, perhaps they could help me not only professionally, but personally as well." In the end, I hope Humphrey Lansdowne does for ducks what Lassie did for the dog community.
Well, anyways, unfortunately I can only afford to print one copy of "Humphrey Lansdowne: Duck Detective", but I think it'll be worth it. Until next time, Max Labels: max posted @ 2/08/2007 10:10:00 AM 0 comments
2/07/2007 11:05:00 AM
Hey, gang. It's your "Ink Is It" co-host Nathan Bannigann with what I hope to be a very special idea. If this works out as well as I think it will, you'll never have to spend a dime on printing again. Let's get right to it: From now on, instead of filling your ink cartridges with expensive printer ink, you can use something I like to call "trash juice". Okay, now to make your "trash juice", you're gonna need to gather all the trash from around your house and plop it right into your juicer. Now, you're just gonna blend it until it becomes a fine pulp then throw it in your empty ink cartridge. Kooky, huh? Kooky and free! Alright, we're not done yet. Here's the best part: print, Print, PRINT!
Printing for F-R-E-E, Nathan P.S. Just tried the trash juice thing. It doesn't work. Labels: nathan, printer tip posted @ 2/07/2007 11:05:00 AM 0 comments
2/06/2007 06:53:00 PM
Here's the very first episode of our talk show "Ink Is It!" In this episode, we suggest an animal-friendly use for your ink-less printer and reveal how amazing the world would be if ink were cheaper. And to top it off, Max demonstrates why his high school class voted him "Most Likely To Take the Stairs." Hooray!
Labels: ink tip, inkisit, video posted @ 2/06/2007 06:53:00 PM 0 comments
2/06/2007 07:00:00 AM
Hiya, guys and gals. Boy do I have a brain-buster for ya: try to explain why birds can fly without using the words "wings" and "terrific". Nathan plunked that noodle-scratcher on me this morning and after writing essay after essay and burning through two $40 ink cartridges, I can confidently say that you cannot explain why birds can fly without using the word "terrific". It was a little easier to not use the word "wings" (Hint: just call 'em "feathered flappers".) I guess I don't have to tell you that I've got the three b's: feeling blue, broke, and brain-busted. If anyone can think of a way to get around using the word "terrific", please let me know.
Color me sad, Max Labels: max posted @ 2/06/2007 07:00:00 AM 0 comments
2/06/2007 06:45:00 AM
Nathan Bannigann here, folks. Just wanted to check in and tell you a story you'll find, at best, amusing and, at worst, dreadfully awful. Today I walked in on my wife Jennifer printing a picture of her standing next to our local auto mechanic, Trent Dalehauser. Now, don't get me wrong -- I like Trent. Not only is he a strapping, young fellow, but he is always honest and forthright about the myriad of problems with our automobile. Did you know that you need to replace your steering wheel every 1,000 miles? I didn't. Anyways, though I didn't mind my wife printing a picture of her with Trent, did she really have to print out five hundred color copies? I'm no calculator owner, but plug that into the ol' noodle and my loving wife printed about $160 worth of her hugging the best-looking auto mechanic in town. I calmly explained this to her, noting that, if we want to continue to print at such rates, we'll have to tighten up other parts of our budget, particularly those involving basic upkeep.
The point is, folks, make sure to keep an eye on your printer or, next thing you know, you won't be able to afford toothpaste. Yours, Nathan Labels: nathan, printer tip posted @ 2/06/2007 06:45:00 AM 0 comments
2/06/2007 06:15:00 AM
Fantastic! You made it!! This is Nathan and Max and welcome to our "Ink Is It" website. If you love ink, or are interested in loving ink, we're your guys! Stay tuned for our extra-special episodes of "Ink Is It", as well as games, contests, fun facts, things, surprises, letters of the alphabet arranged in random order, tgjkreqlws, and everything you ever wanted to know about ink and how it makes activities fun. Terrific! And don't be surprised if you see a few summertime suggestions!
Happy Printing, Nathan and Max posted @ 2/06/2007 06:15:00 AM 0 comments |
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